Why?

Why, indeed, am I sitting here in a camp chair, gazing at a wood fire, with rain coming down on the tarp I cleverly put up last night, when I could be home, with all the associated comforts, including a roof? There must be a reason other than that Joan unexpectedly likes doing this stuff.

Requires a bit of thought. I begin with a few stray ideas:

We are miles from home and the cares that go with it. No lawn to mow, garden to tend, carpet to vacuum, dish washer loads to deal with. No phone. No internet. We have only the cares that we choose to bring with us. Decisions, responsibility, duty, these are not banished, but suspended. We have lots of time to visit together, a thirty-plus year habit that I don't want to cure, and with some effort, we can avoid stressful topics. A major factor.

Yes, there are inconveniences here. Coffee making is not automatic. Dishes are hand washed, but there are few of them. I have to stand up in the morning, starting inside a low tent, crawling out, then getting to my feet, which has become a chore in the last year. It is quiet, except for the rushing-water sound of the river. It is quiet at home, too, except for the airplanes above, and the air boats on the river below, but it is generally quiet. I hear more neighbors here than at home. The cars and four-wheelers are closer here, so noisier. The view here is tall spruce trees, while at home there are mountains, a big river, and even spruce, birch and aspen trees. In all, I'm no more uncomfortable here than the condition of the body allows. Inconclusive.

Since I left my shoes at home (I'm wearing sandals), hiking is out this time. Usually, hikes are fun and a positive part of a trip. We still walk to the river and around the camp ground, but no treks this time. Shoes are definitely on the checklist now. I still have my toys, those that I want to use. I have music if I want to play it. I have both electronic and paper things to read. No TV and no news! I didn't leave ALL the goodies at home, but I left the ones that bring in stress. This is positive.

Do I "commune with nature"? Not any more than usual, I think. Home is surrounded by the stuff, after all. Even the moose come around home occasionally, although the porcupine, all grey and yellow and bristly, was cool to see. I don't think nature is much of a factor either way, but it's a small positive.

I don't think I'm done with this track.